--- A THOUSAND GOODBYES ---
26th November 2014

Would you forgive me if I ran to hide
From a thousand goodbyes I carry down inside
A thousand nights in the dark alone
A thousand houses, but not one home
A million screams now all feel the same
God and the Devil both know my name

People call me crazy, and try to put me in a slot
They love to pet the leopard, then they judge me for my spots
What does the world expect crazy to be
If they'd look in the mirror they'd see it wasn't me
The cliffs of their judgment have been so steep
Despite that what I've sown is exactly what I've reaped

Will the angels of Heaven ever speak my name
Have I tainted my spirit with desire and shame
Are all of my prayers unheard in the end
Is the absence of a feeling proof they're pretend
So many liars who can to do it with a smile
Their love is a knife that they twist with style

Fifty years is a long time to fail
Continuing to try while you mute the inner wail
With everything from alcohol, to food and sex
Simple failures can become complex
Lacking the courage to put an end to the pain
Crying in the dark with a blade to your vein

In a thousand cells I've carved my name
Left my hopes and dreams as I've shouldered the blame
For all of the bridges I willfully burned
All the loving hearts that my selfishness turned
The thousand goodbyes I now carry inside
Are a thousand ways that I've swallowed my pride

I pray for the goodness I see others live in
Then I get off my knees and continue to sin
My choices seem to be rooted in self-hate
I try to wish it away, but it seems to be fate
Smiles then tears, and happiness then strife
This is the bi-polar cycle of my life

The world is filled with joy and pain
Love and laughter; sunshine and rain
A thousand different prayers, every one of them heard
The trinity of faith hears every single word
In this respect, my life has been the norm
But in every other way...it's been a perfect storm

Would you forgive me if I ran to hide
From a thousand goodbyes I carry inside
A thousand nights in the dark alone
A thousand houses, but none were my Home
A million screams now all feel the same
God and the Devil both know my name

Jeffrey P. Frye
murderslim.com
Bank Robber's Blog
bankblogger.weebly.com
@bankblogger2

--- ANNIVERSARY BLOG 2.0 ---
22nd November 2014

Last month marked the two year anniversary of the Bank Robber's Blog. Although I'm the one that provides the criminal content, the blog was created by Steve Hussy, one of the owners of Murder Slim Press. My introduction to Steve came much in the same way that I meet most people in the Free World these days-through email. It was around three years ago that I was sitting in my cell at the United States Penitentiary in Lewisburg, Pennsylvania, and the totality of my circumstances (and time) had me hunched over and feeling depressed. I picked up a book that contained publishers with their email address from all over the world, and I decided to see if a publisher would accept my request to communicate with them via email. I didn't have anything to offer for publication when I did this, nor had I ever written anything for publication before this day. I'm a paralegal, and I'd written a successful appellate court brief for a man convicted of knifing somebody, but up to that point in my life, this was the only stab at creative writing that I'd ever taken.

When Murder Slim Press accepted my email request, they told me that they had never published anybody who was in prison before, and that I most likely had a better chance at making parole then I did at having them publish me. Squire Hussy asked me if I would write something about my life back here, and when I read this question from him on the computer screen, I shrugged, and said out loud, "Sure. Why not." I made a triple shot of coffee, and went back to my house and hammered out a 1500 word piece and called it PRISON PROSE. I offered it for the 6th edition of their literary magazine THE SAVAGE KICK, and when I hit the "send" button that night, I went back to my cell and went to bed. When I woke up in the morning, I had an email from MSP telling me that they'd purchased the piece and that "I was in." I spent the next six months emailing Steve, and one day he sent me an email telling me of the creation of this blog. My first blog was titled THE USUAL SUSPECTS. Unfortunately, you'll have to purchase my cook BANK BLOGGER in order to read that one now. Is it worth spending $12.00 for the book just so you can read this blog? What are you crazy? Of course it is.

The purpose of the Bank Robber's Blog is to serve as a marketing vehicle for the sales of my books. In this last year, I've had the book ONE CRAZY DAY released by Murder Slim, and there's another one coming in the next few months titled STORIES FROM THE LIFE. I also have a full-length fiction novel named THE LIFE OF RILEY that's due to be released in 2015, and that I'm excited about. Murder Slim Press gives me almost complete control and discretion when it comes to choosing what I want to blog about. I live behind walls that contain extreme criminals; criminals that America has segregated from society in order to protects her citizens. I am considered to be one of these criminals. I think that America has overestimated my gangsta.

When I began blogging, it was not my intention to become your criminal Sherpa. But it seems to have turned out that way. I do my best to pull a brick out of the wall that surrounds my life so that you can take a peek into my world and subculture. I guess that I could blog about other things besides crime and prison, but would you really want to read blogs by me on topics such as yoga? The Yoga Robber's Blog? That sound like a stretch.

However, since I blasted into the blogosphere two years ago, I have blogged on a number of different topics. Some of them, on their face, would appear to be abstract. But I eventually try to connect the dots between your world and mine. Because in the end, human nature is human nature, no matter where the human lives.

A lot of people have asked me why I don't blog about the hypocrisy and corruption of the Untied States government, and some of the inhumane ways that it treats its citizens. It doesn't matter what country you're in when you read this blog, whether it be England, Denmark, Australia, Japan, or the United States, because I can guarantee you that your government is rife with hypocrisy and corruption. I can also guarantee that it treats a certain demographic of its citizens in a less than humane fashion. There are plenty of blogs that cover these topics. But this is the Bank Robber's Blog, not CNN or the fucking BBC. So if you're looking for that kinda whiny drivel from me, you can fuhgettaboutit. Nobody likes a whiny Bank Blogger.

In the last two years, I have written well over 200 blogs and stories. You haven't read all of them, but somewhere within the hallowed hard drives of Murder Slim Press, they exist. They are the ones that decided when a blog gets published.

Some of my personal favorites are: DANCING WITH THE STARS (10/2012); MOB WEEK (1/2013); THE STORY OF JOSHUA ?/(published in three parts in 7/2013); A NOTE FOR BEATRICE (7?/2013). There are also a couple of the Free Frye Fund that I like too (WINNING THE WAR WITH BEN & JERRY'S and MY CRIMINAL FOOTPRINT). If there's a topic that you'd like to see me blog about, or if you have any questions or comments, please post them to MSP's Facebook page. I like your feedback, and it also let's me know if I'm writing about things that you like. My goal isn't just to entertain you, it's also to reach you.

Writing for publication from incarceration can have its limitations. One of the main issues that I encounter is that prison is a vortex of negativity, and that this kind of atmosphere is not conducive to being creative. When you're a writer, sometimes you create things that are surprising even to you, and these things excite you and you want to share them with somebody. I would imagine that writers in the free World have people that they can share these kinds of emotions with who are happy for them. If I tried running up to one of these narcissistic meatheads back here about a blog that I was excited about, they'd give me a vacant stare, then say something like, "You found a way to work Gandhi and This Fucking Guy into a blog? That's fucken beautiful, man. Hey, you wouldn't happen to have a cup of coffee I could bum, would you?"

The main thing that works against me though is the good old U.S. mail. If I would've known then, what I know now, I would've robbed post offices instead of banks. I spend hours writing and then typing chapters of the RILEY manuscript, then I mail them to Alexius Rex (alexiusrex.weebly.com) for him to layout and then email to people who are reading the manuscript as I write it. So far, the post office has absorbed two complete chapters (see lost).

These people here may be incompetent, but they're not stupid, because they keep the mailroom personnel behind bars and a bulletproof glass while we talk to them about our complaints. When I went up to the mailroom to complain about my chapters getting lost, the guy listened to me while he emulated concern. Then he shrugged, like, "Whaddya gonna do?" Then he mimed another gesture that said, "Are we done here? because I'd really like to get back to the porn on my computer."

So these are a couple of the obstacles that I encounter being a writer in prison. I carry a pen and folded up piece of paper with me at all times, and pull them out and begin to write when the words magically come to me. I may be responsible for how the words are arranged and are ultimately delivered to you, but I have no idea where they come from. It's all a big mystery to me. I'm just glad they come. And I'm grateful that there are people all over the world who want to read them. Go figure.

When you get a minute, check out some of the other thoroughbreds in Murder Slim's stable of writers. Check out Mark SaFranko (marksafranko.com). Also check out New York Times bestselling author, Seymour Shubin, who recently passed away. And check out my personal friend uv ray (uvray@moonfruit.com) and his new book The Migrant. uv ray is a master at dark, articulate prose on the realities and struggles of life. Like good writing sometimes does, his prose makes you stop and think about your own life, and it sometimes makes you glad that your life doesn't mirror one of the characters in his books.

This anniversary blog is really just my way of saying thank you for reading the blog and for buying my books. Because without you, there would be no Bank Robber's Blog. Happy Anniversary. In 52 Cheeseburger Days, we'll get together and do this again.

Jeffrey P. Frye
murderslim.com
Bank Robber's Blog
bankblogger.weebly.com
@bankblogger2